{"id":454,"date":"2008-02-15T23:22:28","date_gmt":"2008-02-16T07:22:28","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/danklass.com\/pill\/?p=454"},"modified":"2008-02-15T23:22:28","modified_gmt":"2008-02-16T07:22:28","slug":"helga-rules-an-update","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.danklass.com\/pill\/2008\/02\/15\/helga-rules-an-update\/","title":{"rendered":"Helga Rules: An Update"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img decoding=\"async\" align=\"left\" title=\"Helga Rules!\" alt=\"Helga Rules!\" src=\"http:\/\/www.danklass.com\/pill\/helga_sm_roid.jpg\" \/><em \/><\/p>\n<p><em>Hello.  Remember me?  My name is Helga.  I am the Eastern European dominatrix who performs the voice of Dan&#8217;s computer.  How are you?  Whatever.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>As you are probably guessing by now, Dan has no new episode of The Bitterest Pill for you this week.  Even though he promised he would do a new show once a week, he&#8217;s already letting you down.  I hope you&#8217;re not surprised.  If you are surprised, you are a bigger idiot than Dan is.  <\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>I am going to warn you, he is going to claim it&#8217;s because he has  no voice.  He will make some excuse about being sick this week, and coughing all the time, and having no voice.  It&#8217;s all bull crap.  He&#8217;s been yelling at those kids all week, and seemed to do that just fine&#8230;<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Hello. Remember me? My name is Helga. I am the Eastern European dominatrix who performs the voice of Dan&#8217;s computer. How are you? Whatever. As you are probably guessing by [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[12,16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-454","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-news-updates","category-premium"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.danklass.com\/pill\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/454","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.danklass.com\/pill\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.danklass.com\/pill\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.danklass.com\/pill\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.danklass.com\/pill\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=454"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.danklass.com\/pill\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/454\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.danklass.com\/pill\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=454"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.danklass.com\/pill\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=454"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.danklass.com\/pill\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=454"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}